Only 2 more to go

So, I've now had 6 out of 8 chemo treatments! Nothing new with this one. I had lovely visits with my friends Penny & Ramona - thanks for taking time out of your day to come and sit with me! Then my sweet daughter, Jenny, spent the last little bit with me and brought me home - loved spending time with you! Thank you, Sarah, for watching the kids so Jenny could come!

Friday we spent the day on the Alpine Loop. We got a table right by the river - I love the sound of the river. While we were eating lunch, a humming bird came right up next to Kent's face and then hovered all around him. Kent was wearing a bright Hawaiian shirt covered in flowers! :) It was really amazing - I wish I'd taken a picture. Here are a few pictures of Kent's growing collection of wild flowers:

These were some of my favorites.

He claims this was his:

Despite the bone pain, I had a really lovely weekend. Harry Potter is AWESOME and it was so fun to see it with most of my kids! For the first time in a long time I was able to attend all 3 meetings on Sunday. Our grandson, Jackson, gave his first talk in Sacrament meeting. He did such a great job. He looked at the audience, he spoke slowly and clearly and didn't seem very nervous! Way to go, Jackson! I was able to go home and lay down until our Sunday School started - maybe THAT'S why I made it through all 3! It was really nice to be in Relief Society. I love all of the sisters, so.

Now it is Monday morning and my bones are still hurting. Last night wasn't the greatest, but I did sleep!! If things go as before, the pain will be gone by tomorrow. :) [The bone pain has not left. It isn't worse than before but is lasting longer. -- I'm hoping I can sleep better tonight!]
I started this yesterday but set it aside because I couldn't quite decide what it is I want to say.

Despite the pleasant things I did this past weekend - they weren't as pleasant as they would have been if I didn't have cancer. I never feel totally joyful or enthused about whatever it is I'm doing. I haven't suffered what many people suffer from side-affects but emotionally I struggle. Even if I'm feeling "good" there lurks in the background this disease with all of its unknowns: Will it come back? Will I be strong enough? What am I suppose to learn from this and am I learning it? Is there something worse coming?? I HATE CANCER!!!


Yet, how dare I feel sorry for myself when my 2-year-old great niece just had a softball-sized tumor removed from her little head! She still faces chemo or radiation, or maybe both. How do you explain to her why she feels so bad - or what exactly it is that is happening to her?! Did I mention that I HATE CANCER!?

One thing I HAVE learned - your prayers in my behalf, work. I feel so much love and care from all of you and I love you for it!